The Newlyweds Guide to Marriage

This past weekend I was at a baby shower with a lot of friends, which in the first place was AWESOME.  I really do not see any of those girls enough so it was great to catch up and celebrate Jessica and little Josh Jr.  One of these friends is soon to be married so of course we were all giving her our advice.  Keep in mind we have all been married less than 5 years.  They say those are some of the toughest though, right?  Personally, I sure hope so because this is going to be a breeze if that is the case!   Anyway, I thought it would be a fun thing to share with you guys and look back on in a few years.  So without further ado:

The Newlyweds Guide to Marriage

1. Forget about the clothes hamper.  He's never going to put all this clothes in it.  It doesn't matter if you move the hamper to where he throws his dirty clothes.  He will simply find a new spot because that one is now occupied.

Only in your dreams...

2.  ASK him to do thing you want him to do.  Husbands are not mind readers even though I know I am guilty of expecting him to be sometimes.

3.  Sometimes he will not be able to answer the phone for hours on end.  This is the worst when he was supposed to be home an hour ago.  The important thing is to NOT FREAK OUT.  (It has taken me a year and half, but I am finally getting better at this one.)

This is not a good look for anyone.

4.  The sooner you both realize he has married a crazy person, the better.  Marriage makes you the crazy version of yourself.  I don't know how, but it does.

5.  Men and women are different.  VERY different.  On her way out the door, a woman will take out the trash sitting by the door.  On his way out the door, a man will step over the trash by the door.  Please refer to #2 for how to solve this one.

6.  Despite what you may sometimes think, your husband really does want you to be happy.   It works best when you help him do that.

7.  Don't worry about "The Milk Argument."  It happens to a lot of us.  You wake up to eat breakfast and he has just drunk the last of the milk.  At this point you realize you have married the most inconsiderate person on the planet.

8.  Keep an eternal perspective.  Don't sweat the small stuff.  Pick your battles. Ect...  How important is having milk on your cereal anyway?  Are you going to remember that for eternity?  I doubt it.  And if you do, I hope it is because you are laughing about it like me.

Put the sword down.

9.  As a preemptive strike, go ahead and triple the amount of food you think you are going to need at the grocery store.  Also it helps to find things you like but he doesn't.  That way they will not DISAPPEAR.

10.  That smelly, sweaty, crazy, funny, ridiculous guy beside you on the couch....He's your best friend and companion for eternity.  As long as your remember that, you'll be okay.

My smelly, sweaty, crazy, funny, ridiculous guy. :)